Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
