Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
