And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
