do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
We're too hungover to prance.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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