he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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