i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
