I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
