she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
im holly from the hills drunk
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Randomize
