I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
