not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It's rum buckets o'clock
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
