Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
