Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
