you guys were way drunker than both of me
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
