You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
You can't motorboat a personality
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
