Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
