After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
