And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
