This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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