The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
