I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
