is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
