she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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