I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
