no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
