Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
