Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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