Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
false alarm, still single
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
