i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
