Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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