apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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