I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize