Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
