Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
