He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
