i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I wish i was in the wii world.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
