Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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