at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Sorry my hands just texted you
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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