His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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