SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
