no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize