I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I could fuck to npr.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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