I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
