The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
