So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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