ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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