so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
