yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
