Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
