Christians are straight up FREAKS
I got chris browned last night
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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