let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
