Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
